Toxic People: Freeing Yourself of Their Grasp

Positivity

Toxic: “Used to describe a person who is tainted by a subconscious malevolence or psychosis that affects the lives of those who come into contact with them.”  – Pete Bog Man, Toxic, Sept. 9, 2015,  www.urbandictionary.com  

It goes without saying that there are many types of toxic people in this world.  Some may be your own friends, family, co-workers or even just people you interact with in the run of a day.  Needless to say, the interactions we have in dealing with these types of people can affect us in various and negative ways – some ways in which we might not even understand or notice at the time. Choosing how to deal with these types of toxic people is key and we must not let their behavior and/or actions towards us bring us down negatively.  Easier said than done, right?

Well, take it from me it is possible.. I have had my fair share of experience in dealing with self-destructive, disrespectful and even sometimes violent, toxic people.  There is nothing worse however when it can come from your own family members for we rely on and respect what our family has to say or thinks about us.  People who do or say hurtful things in the heat of the moment generally have issues themselves – things that are going on with them that you may or may not know about at the time or there are underlying mental health issues that haven’t yet been dealt with.  Whatever the case may be, we all must remember that hurtful words, violent outbursts or any type of negative and harmful actions are not acceptable and cannot be withdrawn once they have been said or the action has been carried out.

In speaking with friends and co-workers it seems that at one point or other in their lives, they have been made to feel like they will never become something or amount to anything.  They will never be anything more than the failure their brother, sister, mother, father, etc. has become.  This is a lie.  Never, ever allow yourself to believe these unjust words.  Do not give it a second thought.  We as human beings were put on this earth for a reason.  I believe that reason is to make this world a better place, not to succumb to the harshness of others and their words or actions against us.  To rise up and conquer against all odds!  To make anyone who has ever felt less than or unworthy, to know that they matter and they are destined for greatness!  It does not mean we all must strive to become doctors, therapists or cops – we must simply become the best that we will allow ourselves to be.  Carry out each moment with conviction and kindness.  Do what you can in this life time to make others happy, but first and foremost, we must also make ourselves happy!

We will be tested along the way.  We will come into contact with various types of negative people who seem to want to bring us down or burden us with their negativity, but we must look past that.  In that moment, we need take a second to understand why this person would do or say such hurtful things towards us.  That’s not to say that we must look past their words or behavior and accept it – let it be known that you will not tolerate that kind of toxicity in your life and then move on from it.  Some people tend to lurk in the darkest corners of themselves and will do or say anything to bring those around them down to their level so they can temporarily feel better.  But they never do.  It is a vicious cycle – an unending toxic loop that they get caught up in and can’t fight their way out.  For these people, my heart goes out to them.  Do what you can to help them see that they are better than this and can rise up, just as you have from these dark moments of self doubt.

“You are deserving, you are lovable and you are great!  Don’t let a toxic person affect you to the point that you forget that.”  – Bohemianfluff 

I hope this blog has helped with anyone who is going through these struggles of self doubt or who may be tormented by harsh words or actions of those around them.  You will get through this, you just need to believe in yourself.

If you or someone you know may be struggling with issues, don’t hesitate to visit the link listed below: www.teenhealthandwellness.com/static/hotlines

The Power is Yours

As always, thank you for reading my Bohemianfuff!

~ Lots of love ~

Introducing: Tuna Fish!

As the “About” tab states, I am a crazy cat lady… Or as I like to call it: Cat Enthusiast. Growing up, I was robbed of the joys of having a playful, mischievous bundle of fur (otherwise known as a cat) due to the fact that my mother is allergic. The very short list of approved pets allowed in our household growing up consisted of fish, fire belly newts and hamsters. There was a short period of time where a Shih Tzu (who thought he was a Husky) became a part of our family. Unfortunately as we lived on a farm at the time, poor Twig bless his little soul, never made it home one wintery evening. I did not have any more pets for quite a while after that evening as I was truly devastated. After graduation I moved out on my own, into the world and that soon changed.

Meet Tuna Fish. She is an extremely furry beast with a heart of gold that she only chooses to share with a very select few people.

She enjoys long, suffocating cuddles in the evening (and by cuddles, I mean all 12lbs of her sprawled out on top of my chest), begging for people food like a puppy and attacking any movement she sees underneath the bedspread – needless to say, wearing socks to bed is strongly encouraged!

She isn’t fond of strangers (human or animal), she will only play if it is on her terms, otherwise her sister usually ends up with a claw to the nose. She refuses to let me attend the washroom alone and she absolutely hates the vacuum. Just hearing the sound of the closet door opening and the vacuum being wheeled out gets her all fluffed up thus resulting in deep, wildcat-like growls, hissing and spitting. It is safe to say that Tuna does not enjoy when we vacuum!

Tiny Tuna FeetIn this crazy, busy and sometimes noisy world that is our household, Tuna will occasionally seek refuge underneath the coffee table. For her, this is her safe zone. You will sometimes find her tiny Tuna feet sticking out from beneath the table as she isn’t exactly the best at blending in to her surroundings.

Though Tuna Fish tends to be a very misunderstood creature by outsiders, she has brought so much joy to our lives. As I’ve read before, only cat owners “get” their cats. Each bundle of fluff out there has a very distinct and unique personality and the bond between cats and their humans is an extraordinary one. If any of you readers out there have been contemplating adopting a cat, I strongly encourage you do so! You won’t regret it. People seem to think that cats tend to be boring or passive aggressive, but that my friends is a myth! For you will forever have a friend and will most definitely be forever entertained!

Happy Cat Saturday & thanks for reading!

Tuna the Explorer

Leave Your Worries At The Door

The other day I was speaking with my mom on the phone and she mentioned how my baby sister has been recently feeling distraught about life and thinks time passes all too quickly these days. Presently, my baby sister is 9 years old. Quite the little philosopher! It takes me back to when I was a teenager and had my “(far too early) teenage life crisis”. It was on the cusp of my 17th birthday and I asked myself two questions: what have I done with my life this far and who am I? Well, I will tell you one thing, baby sister and readers – it has been almost 10 years since I’ve asked myself those two questions and I do believe I’m still searching for the answers!

Time does pass us too quickly and as you get older, the pace accelerates to a sprint! One morning you wake up and it’s a balmy 20 degree June morning, the birds are chirping and you just know it’ll be the best summer yet! The next morning you wake again and it’s now halfway through December and you’re lost amongst a sea of holiday shoppers, scrambling to get those last minute gifts. It used to bring me such anxiety, constantly thinking about time and if I’m at “where I should be in life”. However, I like to think that at this point in my life I am now learning to take it one day at a time. I’m beginning to enjoy the small things in life and stop trying to force all those big moments to happen all at once. Rome was not built in a day and a person cannot achieve true happiness constantly worrying about the next step, the next move, the next big life event. For too long I’ve worried about the person that I “should be” and am now embracing the person I’m meant to be.

Life is short and for some, it is even shorter. Embrace every moment that is thrown at you. Stop worrying if you look “too big” in that dress. You look great! Stop worrying about whether or not you’ve chosen the right haircut. You were meant for that haircut! Stop worrying about what people might think about what you have to say. Say it anyways! Live life to the fullest and don’t waste any time with worrying. You can’t take those worry-filled moments back and had I felt the way I do now, almost 10 years ago.. I’m sure I wouldn’t have had my “(far too early) teenage life crisis” and my 17th birthday would have been epic!

So, with that being said – I challenge myself and those reading this to make a conscious effort to stop the overthinking, stop the worrying and to just live! Soak in every second of each day! Tell friends and family how much you love them. Smile back at the old man you passed sitting at the bus stop. Hold the door open for the person behind you at the coffee shop. Be present in each moment and relish in the positive vibes you give and receive because in this busy, all-too-quickly-passing life it is easy to get caught up in the negativity, stress and worries. Just breathe and take it one day at a time. I promise you won’t regret it!

Wander Without Reason

Hello world!

My first blog! Well this is exciting! I haven’t written for a very long time and now, here I am posting for the world to see!

Let’s just jump into it then – I’ll save the juicy deets about my life for the “about me tab”, don’t fret! The main focus for my blog (at this point in time) is to just spread some positivity. Whether it be just for myself or for a little bit of the world to see, it doesn’t matter! Spread some love!

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love. inspire. encourage. create.

Happy blogging!